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So now i hear it, now i know. For the past few months I've been completely aware, yet i have to read it tonight. Tom's right, words hurt, words ruin, but also....words heal. I have always been one to beat myself up about certain aspects of my life, sometimes physically, mostly mentally. My life prettymuch only consists of Kayla and my few real friends, and school. Fun, isn't it? Well my few joys left are only obtained through my friends. Such as the slowly, yet steadily, emerging band, which only now lacks someone who has already been chosen but hasn't shown interest lately. But that's not the point of this post. I write only because today I've really realized that, well, that I've been unfufulling to my friends, and unworthy of any one's love. Yet, i know i get it anyway. I argue with my parents and peers, acting like i don't care anymore. It's true, sometimes i don't. In reality they just want to help, like everyone else i know... i find that i tend to hang around with those that care the least, yet i have the most hope for, until lately though. The Haltoms and Chris, and Max, They should be where my allegiances lie. What am i talking about, allegiances? I've always most people as equals, even if they don't deserve it... But, even now...as most of you sleep, I'm beating myself up for not being who I'm meant to be......now tonight, no more procrastination on my homework, I'll get it done, i just never really cared i guess, and i have a million other things to work on. And i will work on them, because i know that without my friends, I'm just a guy in a school without hope..........Thanks tom, for the words you might not have know would help, and if you did, well w.e, thanks.